My son Young Chris is a star!!! we need to market him lol!!!!

This Feeling.........

Currently Playing:Allure", Jay-z

this song is RAW musical genius....i've been feeling GREAT.

the company's shaping up quite well. I had a meeting with an independent photographer this morning...this dude is NICE..i wanna get him on board for this project we're working on...this dude is VERY talented and will be fine with us.

Things are going well. we were working hard as hell last night to get our website content out to our is what it is

talked to shorty last night...very brief convo but it's not so bad now...i need a shapeup before i hit up Rob's party...i love being my own boss

Successful Black Men,Arrogance and How It Can Affect Their Relationships

So, my business partner and I were having a convo about how success can change people. I argued that, as a young black man in America who's on his way to big things, i have EVERY right to be arrogant and aggressive in my demands for things i want/need, females included.

I'm 22. College Educated (or in the process). Entrepreneur and President of a REAL marketing organization. Black and proud. Smart. Perceptive. Analytical. Knows What He Wants. Aggressive.

so why is it that because I know my value as a black male and am quick to let people know i know it, i'm the "angry black guy" or the "arrogant guy with a big mouth"

"Everyone looks at you strange, say you changed/ like you worked that hard to stay the same..."

like my dude Katt Williams said, "If you're doing the same shit you been doing since last year, i can't even fuck with you..."

Enter the topic of "independent women". Touchy subject to me. I like females who can pay their own way. cheaper on my pockets. of course, if the relationship is strong and we have mutual respect/"like" for each other, i dont mind paying. Difference between paying and tricking. Paying-you're enjoying the shit you do regardless of her being there. For instance, i like Pizza and going to new places. Her being there just gives me company and someone to share laughs and sarcastic comments with. Tricking-"I wanna take you to this expensive ass restaurant, even though i dont know you from Adam." You ALWAYS have to feel a chick out to see if she's worthy of your standards....

either way, I REALLY think i'm at a stage in my life where it's totally Machiavellian. if you're not in my intimate circle, which is extremely hard to get into depending on how i see you, you dont need to be around me unless it's professional or academic. I have friends who i love etc...but i tend to be very sarcastic to associates. i have a reputation of being an asshole. i call it insurance. if you could stand that/stand up to it, i definitely can rock with you....i was thinking about shorty's asking me if i'd outgrow her and me not being able to give her a straight answer. i think her perception of me is that I can be with people only so far as they serve my ends. I dont blame her for thinking that way, but it's more like: "I'm young, black, starting off my company; i cant have wack chicks in my circle how arent doing anything for themselves."

so then the convo changed to "Certain women are irreplaceable"...i recall having see A Bronx Tale, and Sonny tells Calogero, that you only get three truly great women in your lifetime. i guess for me, it's be my mom (she's been through a shitload of stuff. i havent been the best son, but i'm maturing now and learning to appreciate her sacrifice.), my aunt Carmen (who's been like a second mom to me) and ________, who is yet unknown to me, but known to the Higher Power. For now, Shorty made a good impression on me, but i feel VERY distant, due to the schedule conflicts. I've done a lotta things with her that i havent done for a girl ever, not to get too into depth lol and no i didnt eat the box. i truly think that we are destined to love at least one member of the opposite sex, and that person will always be in our minds. me, im on some shit right now where it's like:

"ok, she doesnt want me. it hurts. but too bad. i'm a great catch. ill find more."

females HATE hearing that shit. but they know it's right. why should a dude have to wait for you to stop your dilly dallying, just so he could be with you. there's a lotta females out there, you should be scrambling to make the best impression. esp with men who know they got it, like myself, i think we have limited tolerance...but i'll keep it funky. i still like shorty but i'm getting to a point where i couldnt be with her anyway based on this sex stuff and all that. me being 22, i'm gonna want to tap something. the shit is torture, not having sex with a girl you like. but i cant even fault that. if i had a daughter (and i hope i dont cuz i'd be the asshole father), i'd want her to have standards. but yet, at the same time, i showed i meant no harm, had my head on straight (save for a few rants lol), etc. it's hardwired into all young men. we need (). and i really think females are better at holding out that we are.

it's just this simple fact: We're a society based off convenience. We want the easiest workable option. At the same time, i've never been the type to wait for anything i wanted. i always threw a tantrum or let it be known (however blunt) that i want what i want. Part of me just doesnt think the time is right right now at least. But at the same time i DONT take rejection well. i want NOTHING to do with that person, at least until i get my head/ego over being's like this rant goes on in my head

"Wait.....I've seen some of your past boyfriends or know what they were mean to tell me, you're rejecting me...a 22 year old, decent looking entrepreneur...for who? a bum ass, lazy, no good bum? you cant be serious!!!"...and yes, having my own company has given me a degree of arrogance. Sorry, cant please everyone!! try being in school, working another job to supplement your income AND running your own business then come try to tell me shit. didnt think so.

People who know they have a certain magnetic quality will ALWAYS use it. bar none. My friend said the biggest thing with independent women is that they let men know that they arent necessarily needed. i cant even front. As a male with a huge ego, it hurts pride to know that a female you're interested in doesnt make you her end all be all. me, personally, i LOVE female attention. i dont like nagging, but depending on my attraction for and quality of said female, i dont mind talking to her and picking her brain. and that's coming from someone who usually has a short fuse for females talking about nothing when in conversation with me. It's a turn on, this independence bit, but it's like you, as a man, you love knowing that you're needed/wanted. just another complexity of life

but it's still MOB to me. people ask about my relationships and all this. i tell em. My job is my main right now. them girls will be there...and in my case, they ALWAYS end up worse than when i left them next time i see then. so it is what it is.

Song Of The Day: Stick To The Script, Jay-z and Beans <>


had a blast @ Mandy's BBQ yesterday...

grandaunt's in town so i gotta see her later

gotta do three drafts of website designs so i gotta get that poppin.