^ shame. finally done with midterms and i have nothing to do today...i dont feel like clubbin or bar hopping....was supposed to hit up this hat spot in Jerz with Pro but i dont feel like going all the way out there..might just BS in the right hand man, Phil's, recovering from a operation so i cant even kick it with him and the crew like i'd normally do on the weekends...

shoulder's killin me from the gym...that's what growth feels like....trying to get right for the summer....

watched all three The Omen flicks last night on AMC..and i cant even front...that dude Damien was scary as hell. wouldnt want no parts of that dude...that's what horror flicks should be like....not this soft ass Jeepers Creepers bullshit....It was also a classic to me and you cant forget about Freddy Krueger and the Jason series...

@ Pros crib listening to some beats...i used to write a LOT, but i guess i just got a permanent writer's block now...we're jokin,sayin how i could write about shorty, and if the beat's right i prolly would...just trying to make her the last thing on my mind right now...

"My boys say i'm open, they say i'm wrong, but they don't see how your ass just swallow a thong"-Oschino 8-O LMAO...not to be a pervert about it, but i like her body...she's caramel, thick, a bit short (about 4'11 or so) and got a nice butt....when i really like a girl, i tend to not really think about that stuff cuz i make a concentrated effort on conversation and makin em at ease...but i'm still a 21 year old male with a sex drive and a dick...i wouldnt say she's my ideal girl, but she's great in my eyes.

that's the other thing i've been trying not to sweat it. i'm only 21 right now. i'm bound to go different places and see different people. if she doesnt pick me, it aint the end of the world...i kinda feel the attraction between us lessening tho...and i have a habit of just not talking to people who it couldnt work out with. i dont see a reason for it.

no more low caesars for me. this shit is terrible...

My Decision

With it being her decision to poly with me or w/e, I've decided to fall back and just be cool about it. I understand there has to be some chase involved but people hate to have people constantly in their face. she's definitely not the only girl in my picture but she presents the most growth oppurtunity. ultimately it's HER decision. with that said, i'm not giving up exactly. just evaluating my options and focusing on myself. come what may, i can say that i've been the most sincere, honest and relaxed than i've been in a while.

however, the one who chases often gets played the most. i may like shorty a lot, but that doesnt mean i dont have some instincts that i have to just give up cuz i'm interested in her.

i'ma just be falling back and improving myself. hit the gym for like the first time in AGES and it felt good. i wanna be good for the summer cuz one of my plans is to hit up Atlanta and spend some time with my cousin Jermaine. ATL would be a PERFECT place for a cat like me to relax and such. these cats talkin about going to Vegas, but after that whole AIDS/HEP C scare going on out there, i want NO PARTS of that shit.

off to the gym.

Stepping your game up in college

well the topic for today is stepping your game up in college. at least the school i got to, it's kinda fast paced, the typical NY aura:"If you aint saying nothing,get the fuck outta my face." cool. never been the type of dude to waste time bullshittin' anyway.

me and my boy were sayin how in our aage bracket, females are more likely toask "Where do you work?" or "What's your concentration/major?" as opposed to some lame shit like "Did you see those new kicks?" or "Why can't we go to McDonalds on a date?"....that's all good. i like a female with some sense of goal and direction. and i just like being around self directed people in general. i tend to be very overbearing, dominating and opinionated whenever i'm in a group and i'm usually the only one like that so its a perfect balance.

the most agonizing part is "waiting" for a female to make up her mind about her being with you. bar what any guy says, i do think that a female ultimately decides the whole relationship process. i think thhat us guys just gotta have our game up and show we got some hustle and sense about us. i'm totally not used to waiting on a female, much less one i like..but i always had a knack for getting what i wanted anyway...i'm not gonna say that the one i'm talking to now is "special", per se...but we do have a sort of nice relationship. she's a bit career oriented, so i want her to just be a chill 21 year old. she wants to "help" me out on some issues she thinks i have. now, i've never really based my life about what people think about me, but i have been a bit funnystyle lately. advice is advice,regardless on who it comes from. i do like what she brings to the table, but i do think a month is more than ample time to make a decision on relationship status. and it's not physical. you must get the mental before the physical.

not like i've been totally "monogamous"...but i still have a habit of attracting girls with boyfriends. nothing i intentionally pursue. it is what it is..

on a side note...Imperial Marketing. 2008. more info later.