Low Expectations....

I'm in my crib on the day after my B-Day bumpin' "Blackout II".

My pops was supposed to take me out for my b-day...it was totally his suggestion. Duke called me yesterday talking about it so I was like ok cool.

I was out all day so I got home and called him as he said and he said he'd be here in a little while. This was @ 7 PM or so....I'm here @ 11:24...I took a nap and shit and I'm still here.

I dont expect much from people. I went out to the big homie Ebonne's party and Mandy and her friend Francesca came through. I broke my No Drinking rule and bought a bottle and just enjoyed the night

I just wish people wouldnt make promises and not come through. At least call me and bullshit me about how a hooker took your $ and you got a rancid syringe in your ass and that you wont be able to make it. I didnt ask for this. YOU suggested it. I'm sitting here with flashbacks of me from 13-18....

I'm like THIS allergic to attention, hence me not having a big party or anything. Everyone wanted one for me but I'm good. I just wanted to chill with some friends. I'm gonna just invite ppl out to Juniors and whoever comes comes. Fuck it.

Big Day

I'm 23.

I wasnt supposed to be here. Heart problems in the womb. I got past it.

I'm here now!!!!

*plays "Glory" from Confessions of Fire!!!*

For the most part it's just another day. I dunno what I'ma be doing but w/e.

I just want some jerk chicken, cheesecake and Fresca. Simple man to please.

Why I'm Single......

So...I just went through a couple of situations this weekend that made me REALLY think about why I'm single. I aint gonna get too much into some of them but they range from conversations with my boys to certain female's reactions to things I've said to them.

I'm often hit with this question: "K, you're doing a lot with your life. Why are you still single?".....

-I cant/won't lie to a female just for some ass. I was talking with my boys and one of my boys was talking about how he tells chicks anything that they wanna hear just so he could have sex with them. I told him I dont do that because 1.) said chick wont respect you when it's revealed you're a liar and 2.) I can't tell a chick I "love" her. I havent said that word to a female in like 5 years.....

-I have my well documented commitment issues. I aint gonna get into it because most of ya'll are prolly familiar but I suck @ commitment and relationships. My longest relationship was about 8 months. I just have the trait of needed constant excitement and thrills and stimulation in all aspects of my life. I also hate being in one place for too long. :-/

-I'm DEATHLY paranoid about my sexual health, often to the point of me being too direct about it.....I just had an incident where I'm just learning that my paranoia can be a blessing. Fact: when I meet a chick, and something's wrong, I ALWAYS get a weird feeling and stop talking to the chick. It then comes out somehow that shorty was a smut or got burnt or something along those lines. I just had an incident where I just realized I couldnt exactly trust a chick I was talking to
because i wanted to get tested with her and this chick was basically frontin'. I took it for what it was. Granted, I'm not the most patient individual when it comes to those matters but w/e. People were like I overreacted cuz its a touchy subject. Ummm, last time I checked, we were all adults and sex is an adult activity. Adults are also responsible enough to be upfront and honest. It's only a touchy subject if you got something to hide. Like chicks always complain guys just want sex, but when we try to be responsible about it, it's another problem cuz of "trust".

So I went to get tested today.. I'm good and it wasnt as nerve wracking as I thought it was gonna be.

All in all, I just want to be understood. I was watching a video where this guy was saying how women always try to make men seem like their intentions are bad simply because they dont line up with theirs. Extremely true.

I just like my space. I SUCK @ relationships. :-/

Near Perfect Week.!

Well...sup ya'll....This week was nuts...definitely a week that had me in a GOOD zone. Lemme tell ya'll....

-Saturday: Attended the A&R Power Summit and worked to help coordinate the event. It was definitely a cool experience. I met a couple of important A&Rs and got a chance to network with some producers. That summit made me respect how hard artists wanna work to get what they want. Especially, in NYC, everyone's a rapper so the summit helps by letting artists get their work judged by REAL A&Rs (no name dropping here, but cats from Bad Boy, Warner Music Group, Sony, Jive, G-Unit and Shady were there.). Shoutouts to the big homie Miss Parker for getting me up in there.

-Monday: Jitters galore. It's the day before the M.E.A.M. Summit @ Baruch. I'm @ Def Jam packing 200 pouches for the Chrisette Michelle Release Party with makeup cases. DOLO. Before that, I was stuck cutting string for w/e it was. I'm like "WTF am I doing this shit for?". I'm a team player so I just do it till I had to stuff the pouches. I was glad to be out that muthafucka....

We had our first BLCK Discussion Panel. It went well and that was sort of the event that set the tone for the week. I felt happy to be part of an event that spotlights black men doing their thing. It was small and intimate and the networking was great.

-Tuesday: Nervous as fuck. I wanted the M.E.A.M. event to run smooth. It goes good and Chris comes through with Tim from College Mkting and talks to students one on one. Group M, Universal, Zee TV and some other companies come through. The event is a success and we get a couple of resumes of ppl who wanna be part of our company. I do some Cornerstone work and just pass the fuck out when I get home. Everyone sorta knew I was tense and edgy so that was cool for it to go well.

-Wednesday: Cornerstone day. Regular shit. Had a meeting with my ppls @ Wealthy Ho$tage Clothing on Church Avenue in Brooklyn. We'll be working with them on some stuff. :-X.

I can say that we'll be holding a Method Man/Redman Listening session there. Here's the flyer!



-Thursday: This was a BIG day. First there's a Wale concert @ Baruch for Spring Fling. It rains but son still puts on a good show. I do some Cornerstone work then go home. I head back to the city for a Digital Media/Music panel @ Le Poisson Rouge, but I'm EXTRA late. After some cockblocking @ the door, I get in. The panel was extremely informative. I forget off top who was there but the CEO of Fool's Golds Records (Kid Cudi, Kid Sister) as well as some ppl from Zune and some other respectable establishments. There's an open bar after so i have two drinks. (Ever since Stasia's party, I dont really drink too much when I go out.LOL). I aint get a stamp so I go back upstairs and sneak into the club (The bar area was separate from the stage area which has its own bar). I see MAD Cornerstone heads and the homie Yannique, Steph and Gabriel as well as Eb and my son Gerard who I havent seen since we were done @ Sony BMG. I forget the order but the performers were J.Cole (more later), Young Chris (another cool dude), Colin Monroe, Tanya Morgan (enhhhh), Kid Cudi (who performs his only song "Day-N-Nite") and Wale who tears it down.

I'm not gonna sit up here and front like I'm a huge Wale fan but he knows how to perform and has good mastery over the crowd. Roc Nation was in the building....That show sorta brought me back to life, with all the shit that's gone down. I was DUMB tired cuz I was on my feet all day but it was worth it.

On some real shit....I like watching a new talent just come through and do his thing. There's somethin' about this kid and with Jay-z/Jay Brown/Ty-Ty's mentorship and him being the first artist on Roc Nation, he can be special. I got word of J.Cole first from my dude Vic @ Mercury Records. I DLed "The Come Up" mixtape and was impressed from jump. The second track "Simba" was straight WOW status. I just spoke to him briefly and told him to keep working on his craft. I was trying to get some tracks from "The Warmup" (next mixtape) from someone but ya'll know how it goes. J said it's coming in three weeks.


-Friday: Cornerstone work in LES and Dumbo....Met with Ca$tro, an artist on Pittsburgh. I posted his vid for "Skinny Nigga Toothpick" on my blog a while back. Son has talent but as I tell all artists who come to NYC...they just gotta keep working @ it and just learn how to get the fuck out the crib and see what the ppl respond to up here. Go to some open mics. Attend shows. Build and cultivate relationships. Son is humble and doesnt talk too much; I REALLY respect that, because in NYC, everyone's an artist and just is in your face all the time promoting their work...and when you get it, it's some trash. He has a spark but it's about finding a sound. I can see some degree of marketability. Ya'll know I dont give a fuck, so I had son bust a freestyle while some lil tourist kid and old lady who looks like she cheats on her Madison Avenue workaholic husband are just looking @ us.

We then met with Brooklyn Bodega and will be working with them for the Brooklyn Hip Hop Festival. I missed it last year, but I heard Blu (who I'm a big fan of) and a lotta other dope acts performed. They got DJ Premier on board this year (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), and I can't really talk on it, but let's just say this idea for an event WILL be a dream come true if it goes down. Primo's a LEGEND and can't no one fuck with him.

Went to the Baruch Fashion Show. It was better when certain other ppl handled it but kudos to them for getting Beenie Man to perform. I was almost caught up but I'm too cool to sweat.

-Saturday: Just chillin...about to hit up Cornerstone and handle some stuff. Party Time later....

It's been a GREAT week for me. With all the bullshit I been going through, it's about time some sunlight came my way.

Pics of Wale @ Baruch.

Interesting Developments

-WOW.....

Looks like I'll be going to work @ the A&R Power Summit later today. I'm amped as fuck. 8-0

-I'm definitely feeling a bit better about everything.
-I can't stop thinking about her. I'm just taking this shit day by day.
-I'm proud of myself. Cornerstone has me as an NYC All Star Rep within my first three weeks of officially being there. My work has been used as examples in company wide emails. It's gratifying to the ego. It also helps knowing people....
-...Who can get me into places like Ciara's Listening Session last night. It was @ my son Jaquan's (http://blackgeniusinc.com/) abode @ the legendary Hall of Fame Studios in Queens. It was "organic" and unpretentious. The whole hood came out and the studio girls were looking good.
-The Playoffs are legendary. I wanna see this Bulls/Celtics game tonight and I smell an upset.

Outty 5000

The Ball's Rolling

-Last night was the first time in a while I got a chance to see a bball game. I like Billups on The Nuggets as he gives them a LEGIT floor general (as well as someone who can help JR on both ends of the floor. Speaking on which, JR will be a problem next season and I KNOW Byron Scott is mad he got rid of him so early)....but they knocked out my Hornets, who were banged up and abused all series. Melo finally gets outta the first round. Nuggets/Dallas will be INTERESTING.

-Barring the tiresome aspect of walking around with a 20 pounds of promo stuff on me, I'm liking this new gig @ Cornerstone.

-I'm thuggin' it out this week. Im still fighting rounds of depressaustion here and there but it's all good end of the day. Just gotta hold it down. I want a tattoo but i dont want any cliche corny shit.

-holla @ me on Linkedin: http://www.linkedin.com/in/karstenvenna. Wanna build up my professional network.

-Summer's about to get hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Poe Picasso




Social networking is a wonder. I was browsing my Twitter (I'm a Twitter whore BTW) and I came across an artist named Poe Picasso. I check out dude's myspace and he has this tape called "Exhibit A". So I check it out and I'm BLOWN away. Ya'll know me.....I appreciate a good lyricist like a Nas, Common or Blu....I listen to X-A regularly so of course I think that Poe's a pretty decent lyricist on the mic so here's our interview in the link Below

http://tinyurl.com/c8vlal